By: Joya Williams
The tears, the tantrums the endless supply of drama. This is not a movie, this is my life.
I am the mother of 2 girls and I am learning that girls equal drama, big emotion and a need for limitless patience. You’d think I’d know that… being a ‘girl’ and all.
“Just wait until you have kids of your own!”
“You’ll understand when you’re a mother and then maybe you’ll have more sympathy for me”
Two of my mother’s favourite lines when I was younger. I’m sure many of you reading this now can relate. What mother hasn’t said this at least once to their child in some form? My mother said any combination of these two phrases so many times when I was growing up that I knew them by heart and probably recited them silently more times than I can remember. (Wow…I was a smug little bugger wasn’t I?) But I never gave it any thought because I was arrogant enough in my youth to believe that I was never as difficult as my mother thought I was being at that time. So what did I have to worry about? As long as my kids were like me I would have no issue…because I was a great kid!
Okay…I’m pausing here so you can finish laughing. No really, I don’t mind!
I’ve been told by my friends that are mothers to boys that the emotional ups/downs aren’t anywhere nears a bad as it is with girls. Yay, I’m so happy for them (yes that is sarcasm). Boys will stomp, yell and break something and then they’re fine. Girls will cry and pout and cry some more, then fight and yell and cry…
My world is filled with “That’s not fair!” “You’re mean to me!” “I’m not your friend!” and my all-time favourite…”I guess nobody loves me in this house”. It’s all the more special when you hear your three year old say it. Sigh…
It’s not fair when I tell my seven year old that she can’t have chips for dinner; and I’m mean when I insist that she eat fruit and vegetables every day. Neither of my girls are my friends when it’s time to turn off the TV and I apparently don’t love them when playtime is over or I say no to ‘just one more movie’.
What a bad Mommy I am. I can barely live with myself.
My mother gets way too much pleasure out of the stories I tell her of the daily challenges I face. I mean she’s actually quite tickled by it all. I’m so glad I can provide her with that much entertainment (yup…there’s that sarcasm again).
So here are the lessons that I’ve taken away from raising two girls:
Remember that you were once a little girl and try to have compassion for your daughter when all of that untamed emotion spills over every so often.
Never tell your mother what your daughters put you through. That’s way too much ammunition to put into the hands of the woman that raised you and knows what you’re really like.
Use your life experiences to help navigate your daughters through the murky waters of growing up and be there to help them deal with the ‘joys’ of puberty.
Good grief! I remember what I was like during that stage!!!
Is it too late to change my mind?
Joya Williams is a working mother of 2 beautiful little girls. She loves to write and currently blogs about her life as a mom at Supermom Doesn’t Live Here. She has also just started a gift basket business called LIFE HAPPENS GIFT BAGS & BASKETS where her aim is to make people laugh on those occasions that aren’t normally celebrated.