By Monica Wong, MSW, RSW, HBCE Counselor, Hypnotherapist & HypnoBirthing Instructor
Fulfilling and challenging, sometimes both within moments, it’s a life changing, complex and wonderful experience. I am blessed and happy to have two adorable children with another one on the way! Days when I get an unprompted, ‘I love you Mommy, you’re the best!, makes my heart simply melts and I feel incredibly lucky to be a mother. Once a mom, your life is forever changed. When my firstborn was an infant, I remember getting thrown up on, moments later peed on and then nearly immediately afterwards – pooped on. ’Welcome to motherhood!’ I remember thinking.
I love being a mother but there are definitely those days when I need a break, a break from everything. It can be overwhelming to go from cleaning one mess after another, while trying to be present with my kids and multi-tasking to the nth degree, AND maintaining a small counseling and pre/post-natal private practice. Life is busy and can get messy.
In my HypnoMothering class, we have a segment called ‘The New Normal/Reinventing Me’. Mothers-to-be or new moms discuss how life will or has changed and how priorities before baby, can change after baby. We make a list of the things that are very important to maintain and make a promise to ask for help to keep those priorities. Asking for assistance can be difficult but it’s important to recharge and come back to your kids with open arms and a happy stimulated brain. For me, it’s not always easy to get away as often as I’d like but it’s important to make the effort. Not only do we benefit when we take care of ourselves but our child(ren) do too.
Just as our kids are constantly evolving and changing as they grow, so too are we. Motherhood is a lifetime of tweaks and adjustments and we all do our best, which is good to remember. Be yourself, provide for, and love on your little one(s) and they’ll be okay.
Soon-to-be and new mom’s, give yourself a break. Remind yourself that you are human and it’s okay to have moments of frustration, wondering, ‘When will I get a break…sleep through the night…eat warm food…do things for me, ever again?!’ Take time to bond with baby, your new family, and yourself. Create and surround yourself with support from family, friends and care providers.
There is help out there if you need it; counsellors, agencies and support networks are all waiting, offering tools and assistance. Choose what works for you. If you have days that turn into weeks or more, where you just don’t feel like yourself and are struggling, seek out a counselor and a mental health team to help. There is hope and things will get better.
I have hope and am as excited as I soon begin a new chapter of motherhood. We welcome our third child into this world; I just can’t wait to see my kids with their new little sibling as they are very excited to meet him/her. Life will get busier; we’ll adjust and our hearts and family will grow with love. What a gift. A wonderful, wild and breathtaking journey.
Hold on, hang in there and enjoy this amazing ride called Motherhood!
For more information:
Ohana Counseling & HypnoBirthing
Phone: (403) 978-2645
Locations in the NW & SW
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