Verbal Diarrhea – Part 1

Sandwich Generation

For the last while I have what many call, writers block.  I have been really stressed out. In part by the things going on in my personal life and at work that I just have not had the time or energy to put into figuring out something to write that my followers will be interested in.

Being a blogger is not easy.  Perhaps if I had started out in the beginning it would have been easier to develop a base of followers but now there are so many “mom blogs” “parenting blogs” it is hard to be unique.

I would love some advise – some inspiration from Modern Mama followers if possible.  What do you enjoy most about the blogs you follow?  What makes you follow a blogger?  Do you enjoy reading articles?  Do you prefer funny memes?  A bit of both?

I would love to write about my life like many bloggers do but honestly it is not as easy as it sounds.  Writing about your life puts your life and everyone else in it, front and Centre for everyone to read about.  While being a blogger is a very public/social thing, there are elements of my life that would not be right to put on public display.  Anything that has to do with other people is not my place to talk about on a public platform even if it effects me.  That is a choice that I have made.  So much of what I have going on in my personal life, especially these days that is effecting me and occupying my thoughts, are situations that are effecting other people. Hence the reason I am having so much writers block.

Recently I was told that I was part of the “Sandwich Generation .  I had never actually heard of this before.  I had to google it.  ” The sandwich generation refers to middle-aged adults (often in their 40s and 50s) who are caring for both elderly parents and their own children. ” source: Wikapedia “a term that refers to adults ranging between 45 to 64, taking care of aging parents and raising young kids and/or financially supporting grown children.” Source: www.hrpa.ca

Yup thats me and my husband! Describes us to a T, only I also have the stress of aging grandparents that need my help and need us to visit more often and the stress of not one but two neurodivergent children under the age of 12.

An interesting article I found was ” Why the Sandwich Generation is so Stressed Out and How HR can help“.  Parents, especially moms have always had their unpaid and undervalued jobs compared to those that are paid by the hour.  Often citing that moms jobs (maid, nanny, chef, taxi driver, administrative assistant, nurse, tutor etc. etc… ) is more than a full time job on its own.  Then add in a part-time and/or a full-time job and the need to take care of aging parents/grandparents it is a wonder we are standing at all.

I have started to stop to take a breath more often these days and think  about how it is that I am managing to do all this.  I honestly don’t know where my strength comes from. I have no idea where my energy comes from. I don’t get enough sleep as it is and I don’t eat as well as a I should.   I worry that one day it will all catch up to me and I will just collapse from exhaustion.

I am trying to cave out “me time” . I have managed to give myself 1 evening a week (usually) where after my full time day job, I don’t go home and instead meet up with friends or do something for me.  It is sad when your full time day job becomes a place to “getaway” and is more calming than it is at home. Just being at work often feels like more of a break than being home with the kids- even though it is still busy at work.  Most of my days off are because the kids are sick or not in school so they are certainly not days for me or days where I can relax.  I am realizing that I am in more and more need of a day when the kids are in school, husband is out of the house and I get the day to catch up on things or relax in piece and quiet or stay in bed.  Don’t get me wrong, I love my husband and kids but I also need time away from them and everything else, for my own sanity and theirs.

Lately I have been finding myself going back to the float tank and I started going into the salt rooms.  They are so peaceful and sometimes all I need is peaceful. I also need to get outside more,  I will work on that as the weather improves. I am in desperate need of a holiday but of course that requires time and money – two things I don’t have enough of these days.

I am not sure this has broken my writers block but it is a start, thanks for listing to me rant. Perhaps this will become more of a regular thing if anything it is helps to be able to get it out and it readers find it relatable.   I know I am not alone.  If you are a fellow “sandwich generationer” let me know if you have any tips and tricks to managing this long term.

How do you relax? What do you find your self needing the most these days?

Thanks for listening!

Tina Evans

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